There’s a reason why I carried that record player
All 10 pounds with an extra 5 of multicolored vinyls
Lying atop the wooden chest

I just wanted to say “I love you” and
Hope you had a good day or something along
Those lines that said “I hope you’re
Okay.”

Being bad at texting and always the one who’s
Worried about one thing or the other
A few calls, no replies, I guess it
Just got to me but

When you texted me those two words

I got lonely

My brightly colored records keep
Recording my lonesome
My sleep never changes to change me though I

Never meant.

I used to get anxiety attacks all the time.
At night, at the times where no one was ever
Awake.
Lately, I feel like I’m going to have them just as
Frequently
But I don’t want them because I know that
No one will be awake.

It’s tempting to just go and
Call her.
After all, I do
Love her.
But if I just keep fucking up
What’s the point?

Maybe I’m just bad timing.

I’m a mess.

When she looked at me and said
how I would make a great mermaid
I wasn’t expecting the response to my
Own amusement and curiosity as a
compliant answer to
make me doubt everything I ever thought I
Really was.
"I’d follow you anywhere."
When really I’m sure it’d be
Me
Following you
Everywhere.

We talked in the dark.

I thought about the adorable French piano player
Who I’d eventually share a first kiss with over a duet of
Liebestraum
And go from there with my stained charcoal fingers
Straining through her angel-soft hair

I thought about the charismatic Italian who
I’d meet for one night over sex and art and then
Like the moon on a
Perfect night
Never see again

Then about that backpacker I’d run into
During a summer spent exploring the deepest depths of
My Persian blood
Traveling the rest of the way with our hands like
Tangled roots of molten brass and gold

Even about the girl who I said
I’d never stop loving for all the incarnations of which
I
Exist

And I realized.

To which may or may not be our inevitable end that
May of which spark itself from the ashes or stay
Dormant into eternal slumber
Somehow thinking in the realistic sense outside of my
Idealistic pool

I’ll miss you forever and regret we
ever fell out of love over a silly thing as

My wanderlust.

Today I smoked myself awake
Waiting for the drops of nicotine to be my catalyst for
Something to cure what is insecure;
Me.

Today I drank coffee that tasted like
A celestial scene to drink in
Without my eyes
Just my tasteless tongue
But when I was questioned it only tasted
Like a firm caffeine chokehold to put
My senses into a numbed state of
Suspension
Without release.

Today I picked up a pencil with thoughts
Of money
Only to put it down
With thoughts of
Love.

Best couple coming through. Bree and Leo are p much the best okay? Okay. That’s why they get an extra and not just because uh. Leo is easily swayed by Bree’s magic hands okay ahahahahahaaaa okay yay let’s go and evaluate how I tried painting boobs

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FINALLY FINISHED ALL THE LADRI LOVINS (with an extra as per certain request, eheh) and so. I used references around these last ones and coloring-wise I’m trying something new, but it feels somewhat half-assed? Probably just need to get used to a different feel. Anywho! Evelyn and F (Kate’s still working on a name for him!) Below, below~

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phototaxis:

Ladri babes from Mal!!! Look at theeeeemmm they are beautiful they are SMOOCHING UNDER MISTLETOE they are going on Leo’s crappy homemade treasure hunt ?!?!?!?! AAAAHHHH

I SEE I MADE A TYPO THO (I was probably wondering how to write dialect and got distracted probably ahahaha)

Merry Christmas bby <3

Posting Kate’s birthday gift now so the world can know how much I love her and am so excited about next summer. HELL YEAH ilu corvus kid

As much as I love onions, garlic, and mushrooms all put together in one beautiful, sauteed beauty on potatoes (so I love you so much it’s hard to believe)

tagged: #Ladri #melon art

So Kate still has yet to name F, but!! I remember having started on this one a very long time ago, but didn’t finish it until now.

I tried really hard to make him Greek as heck